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Many women and men falsely believe they are not attractive and
desirable to the opposite sex (add to the list: same sex, various
farm animals, fruits and vegetables, or whatever else trips your
trigger). There are women who like bald men; there are women who like "body builders" (though I personally think male
"body builders" would repulse every single woman on
the planet). There are men, such as myself, who find women who
do not use makeup to be far more appealing than those that do,
and there are men who appreciate women who use makeup.
If you are a woman who believes your breasts are "too small,"
well, *WRONG!* (Breasts are for infants, not grown men.) The same is
true for the size of one's nose, feet, penis, ears, and assorted
fleshy body parts: there is no way one can know what another person
finds attractive or unattractive until one asks.
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Being rejected hurts. GET OVER IT ALREADY! There are around 310,000,000
people on the north of North America (United States and Canada). That means
there will be around 155,000,000 females and 155,000,000 males (though
there are more females than males by actual count). If one is heterosexual,
one may rule out the homosexuals (around 14% of the population, aka 21,000,000)
of each, leaving 129,000,000 possible lovers, mates, and companions.
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Apes engage in grooming behavior as a tool for social cohesion
and for sexual favors. The extant (existing) apes on Earth at the
moment are gorillas, chimpanzees, humans, and orangutans.
Humans have adapted their grooming habits so much so that we
no longer pick fleas off each other---- we talk instead! If you
find someone you are interested in, walk up to him or her and
start talking; I consider it a complement when a woman takes
the time to stop and talk with me.
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Now here's an idea---- walk up and talk to him instead!
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Maybe she does; maybe she does not. If she does not, what have you
got to lose by walking over and asking? The default is "No, she
does not." (Billions of women don't like you; do not take it
personal--- they have never met you!)
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It means: SMILE BACK!!!!
Sheeeish! See how simple this can be?
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There is a "double standard" that exists that allows
women to make comments or perform lewd acts that men may not.
Having a woman show up naked in a man's appartment might only
result in embarassment all around; having a man show up in a
woman's apartment naked will probably result in arrest and
jail time, with a restraining order issued to keep the incident
from recurring.
This means women may be far more direct than men when it comes
to flirting or giving "come-ons." (I'm not objecting:
I like it this way.)
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In general, the man is "better off" instigating flirtations
and showing interest; if a woman is interested, she will usually
reciprocate. There may eventually come a point where the companionship
turns sexual--- at this point, it is "better" for the
woman to take the lead by "setting the pace." Evolution
(neo-Darwinism) imposes a greater cost on the female during her
sexually active years than on the male, so it should be the woman
who dictates (or in my opinion SHOULD dictate) sexual behavior.
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Naturally, if someone has given you the green light plus set off a
few signal flares and bright yellow flags, you will have a far easier
time in knowing where you stand.
A woman or man who can state her or his desires directly, WHEN APPROPREATE,
can be a Goddess-send!
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While there may be fifty ways to leave one's lover, there must be
fifty thousand ways to meet one's lover. One summer at a Pagan festival
I was standing at my camp stove when a woman I did not know (but
whom I had been eyeing amourously) walked up, picked up a large
spoon, and asked me if I would spank her with it. Out of the
50,000 ways to meet one's lover, I think that one should be listed
at the top. And if it had not worked, there were still 49,999 other
ways.
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I actually heard a woman say this to a drummer a D'Fest. What a great
way to be flirtatious! It lets a man know he is appreciated and that
a woman is interested, and yet allows a polite and friendly means of
declining if the drummer is not interested--- he need only accept the
statement for the fun of the moment and not follow-through: most
women will get the hint and turn their attentions elsewhere.... and
no one's feelings are badly hurt.
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Most human jackasses are male. I believe this to be a self-evident fact.
If you ask 1000 women, 999 will agree. Some jackass behavior:
Talking to a woman's breats instead of to her eyes.
Brushing up against a woman "accidently."
Touching strange women on a pretext. [PRETEXT: 1. An
ostensible or professed purpose; an excuse. 2. An
effort or a strategy intended to conceal something]
Believing that lesbians "only need a good fuck by
a man."
Believing lesbians want to have sex with him. (This is just not
jackass behavior: it's pathetic. Howard Stern is an excellent
example.)
Exposing oneself to strangers, or to acquaintances at inappropreate times.
That should give one a rough idea of what I mean by "jackass."
Women as Pagan and Wiccan festivals are extremely good at picking out
the assholes in a crowd.
My observation is that jackasses are a minority subspecies of the human male:
most are not jackasses. No, really.
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